Monday, July 30, 2012

Employee First!!!

One day while walking down the street a highly successful
Human Resources Manager was tragically hit by a bus and she died. Her
soul arrived up in heaven where she was met at the Pearly Gates by St.
Peter himself..

"Welcome to Heaven," said St. Peter. "Before you get settled in
 
though, it seems we have a problem. You see, strangely enough, we've
never once had a Human Resources Manager make it this far and we're
not really sure what to do with you."

"No problem, just let me in," said the woman.
 

"Well, I'd like to, but I have higher orders. What we're going to do
 
is let you have a day in Hell and a day in Heaven and then you can
choose whichever one you want to spend an eternity in."

"Actually, I think I've made up my mind, I prefer to stay in Heaven",
 
said the woman

"Sorry, we have rules..."
 

And with that St. Peter put the executive in an elevator and it went
 
down-down-down to hell.

The doors opened and she found herself stepping out onto the putting
 
green of a beautiful golf course. In the distance was a country club
and standing in front of her were all her friends - fellow executives
that she had worked with and they were well dressed in evening gowns
and cheering for her. They ran up and kissed her on both cheeks and
they talked about old times. They played an excellent round of golf
and at night went to the country club where she enjoyed an excellent
steak and lobster dinner.

She met the Devil who was actually a really nice guy (kind
 
of cute) and she had a great time telling jokes and dancing. She was
having such a good time that before she knew it, it was time to leave.
Everybody shook her hand and waved goodbye as she got on the elevator.

The elevator went up-up-up and opened back up at the Pearly Gates and
 
found St. Peter waiting for her.

"Now it's time to spend a day in heaven," he said. So she spent the
 
next 24 hours lounging around on clouds and playing the harp and
singing. She had great time and before she knew it her 24 hours were
up and St. Peter came and got her.

"So, you've spent a day in hell and you've spent a day in heaven. Now
 
you must choose your eternity,"

The woman paused for a second and then replied, "Well, I never thought
 
I'd say this, I mean, Heaven has been really great and all, but I
think I had a better time in Hell."

So St. Peter escorted her to the elevator and again she went
 
down-down-down back to Hell.

When the doors of the elevator opened she found herself standing in a
 
desolate wasteland covered in garbage and filth. She saw her friends
were dressed in rags and were picking up the garbage and putting it in
sacks.

The Devil came up to her and put his arm around her.
 

"I don't understand," stammered the woman, "yesterday I was here and
 
there was a golf course and a country club and we ate lobster and we
danced and had a great time. Now all there is a wasteland of garbage
and all my friends look miserable."

The Devil looked at her smiled and told...
 
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"Yesterday we were recruiting you, today you're an Employee" :)

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